I probably should be going to sleep right now; as per usual, I'm still on the computer. Usually, I would be playing a game, surfing the web, doing the crossword, sometimes multiple of the above at the same time, sometimes multiple different games and puzzles at the same time. I think it's safe to say now that it's my ADD, or ADHD, rather, as it is now officially known.
My sentences all contain multiple caveats; I add more words to make the statement truer to what I'm trying to say. There's always a finer point you can put on it.
I can do this all day. It's a dopamine deficiency. I need lots of activity to get enough stimulation in my brain. But then that also makes me useless the rest of the time, or to actually doing the important things in life. I can do all of the above things literally all day. I know, I need to find something out there that gives me that same thrill, and a the same time, grants me an income. Probably not too hard a thing to find, as a professional poker career is untenable, per my amazing girlfriend. Will I find something? I'll look into it tomorrow. But then tomorrow will come...and go, and I'll think of another scheme that I should be doing. Sometimes I'll do one crossword after another for an hour. Then play words with friends, then go on a 3-hour slot machine bender online. There is one I really like. It makes poker super-addicting. It's not the gambling, per se., each hand is thrilling, even if you fold, there is that anticipation as you peek at your cards. Oooh, could it be AA this time? Maybe AK suited? Aww, 9-2, fold. But for that one split second, there is thrill. Let alone the times you win a big pot, or make a great call, bluff, or catch one.
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